Winnie’s blog

hm so summer has been okay. ROP is pretty fun i guess. I like playing around with the 3d and 4d stuff because you can start off trying to do w.e you're trying to make and then BAM it can come out to like anything. and some of that shit is expensive if you're very good. anyways so mi amigas if you want your nails done ;D hit me up a few days earlier :D anyways yeahh i feel alittle distant from friends. joanna i've talked to her for the last few days, but she has other friends to hang with. and jennifer she's working and we have totally opposite schedules. and sheree, lets be honest, you say you're never busy and you're always home but you're not. you're always out and about. in a easier way of saying, you're too busy. plus its always so hard to reach you even though you're like right there. i guess this summer we're drifting a bit maybe when school starts it'll be a little different. i'm turning the big 18 in what 4-6 months. kinda scarey. LOL. right now i have nothing in mind for my birthday. ugh  but i got paper work to do around my birthday. =/ im so stupid. anyways back to my birthday, i kinda hope my birthday to be great you know, instead of the usual dinners(that i end up paying a whole lot more than i should and how i usually end up pissy). lets see 7th grade i spent it waiting for my mom late at night. 8th grade i had to singg in choir and it rained. 9th grade wow took me like 20 minutes to remember this one, i had a birthdya at Shakeys, it was horrible. my food was cold. 10th grade i spent it at Charlies Trio, i spent more than i should because of party crashers. wtf. 11th i spent it at a buffet, that one was pretty decent, it was super super super great but it was sorta fun. anyways yeah i wish i can drive. but thats not going to happen because no car. my mom is still thinking of moving unless we have the personal credit to own this house because its under my cousins name. so yeah i suppose we have money issues right now, since we got a new used car. its pretty decent. well we got 3 but two are really nice and one my dad thought he can just fix it up and it'll work. but no. man next year for summer i got i get to go to vietnam, you guys have no idea how much i love it there. i guess its cause my family from vietnam live in such a decent area. its like a china town but less smellier. 

joannas blog "everyone seems to be hiding some dark dark secret." i guess we all seem to have our own thing you know and i guess thats what makes us close. my dark dark secret is, i'm an ant bully. LOL JK :[ but really i am LOL!. i hate them. anyways yeah i'm tired. and i'm sick of life. LOL

...

if i can love anyone, i'll family. if i can be anyone, i'll be a rockstar. if i can have anything, i'll have a pretty house with a pretty car. if i can feel anything, i'll feel happiness. if i can eat anything, i'll eat watermelon. if i can write, i'll write a pretty song. if i can run, i'll run to baskin robins. if i can fly, i'll fly around the world. if i can talk, i'll talk about saving the world. if i can do anything, i'll design clothes. if i can.

so yeah i'm bored. and i'm bored. anyways where'd everyone go? i don't know. i'm tired. what a lonely summer. see, if i was rockstar i'll be living the life right now. well i'll be a groupie for now :D

the more i think it the more i just believe it

True love waits

so i'm thinking of a purity ring. actually i've been thinking about this since new years. i don't know. i want one because they're pretty and they have a significant meaning to it. i don't have to call it a purity ring. i can call it w.e i want. hm i did a search on it. 1. you don't have to be a Christian. 2. you could still party and etc. 3. its a ring for abstinence of sex until marriage. but i think what if i can't live up to it. LOL! but i would like to try because i want to. so should i get one? and plus i'm in need of a ring. i lost my other nice one. then i youtubed purity rings and my future husband has one but i'm not doing it because my future as one. LOL i didn't even liked them till Camp Rock. LOL. so i'm not really a true fan i guess. LOL but they're music is pretty good well most but all. 

5 to 2-3 am i was in victorville and now i have school. victorville sucks =/ 

Hm ROP was okay. I meet a girl from Shirr High and a "fob" girl from Monterey park and another girl that did go to SGHS but graduated, she's a Vietnamese "fob". They're pretty nice. I hope at least one of them stay because it would be prettyyyy boring. the "Adults" at the place are eh. LOL 

California

I might be moving. It'sa maybe, that's my dream house in that picture. Hopefully it has a nice backyard. I don't know where or when or if we are going to moveI kindof want to move into a bigger, newer, CLEANER house.  If we do move I hope it has a pool and a nice backyard and at least 2 bathrooms. but i dont wanna move too far because i like living near sheree, she's my ride to school :D LOL and sometimes home to places we go. we its very convenient. anyways so i'm hooked on Jonas Brothers. Every since CAMP ROCK. I've been beeboping to their music well actually to their interviews and what now. I'm like stalker mode right now. I know almost everything about them and HAHA I'm just a crazy fan right now but I'll get over it.. soon.

Hi kk I'ma do a double post. Would'n't it be so cool to be a rockstar but a cool one. It'll be eff`n crazy. going on stage every night know people are there to see you. damn if i could live another life i would choose a semi-rockstar thing. Like not a damn scarey rockstar but something like Jonas Brother or like i dont know but when I think of it, it'll be soo eff`n cool HAHAHA

my days are filled with emptiness, my friends are too busy to say hello or to just talk, i have no priorities, my life currently is lifeless. i'm always angry. i have nothing to look forward to. maybe god/buddah/thebigmanupstairs/someonemorepowerful is punishing me.

okay so i give you all these stupid advice and what to say and shit and i feel as though as you dont care. you're such an idiot. you get me mad. you never listen to me, but yet you always tell me your problems or i simply ask you whats up and shit and when i try to hint to you or TELL you what my problem is, you ignore it. you dont even ask me, you dont even comfort me. and you always hate how others go to you but you cant go to them, isn't that what you're doing to me?

-learn to trust no one but yourself. they ALL sooner or later let you down.

Hardcore

sometimes i feel a little used, a little unappreciative. i take my time and watch the baby, feed the baby, bathe the baby , take care the baby, burp the baby, change the diaper for the baby, i do all these shit for you and you take me for granted. i'm not being selfish right now either. i do alll this shit for you and i feel like you take advantage of me. like wtf i do all this shit you ask me. why can't you do one little thing and like pick me up when i need you to. i mean if i was close by i would walk. like the other time i was at hien's house and no one could pick me up and you were at home and so i walked him. you know i do every little thing for you to ease you from being a mother. i make sure she doesn't cry, she gets what she wants and everything but when it comes to Aaron to get a ride you're there for him, even at 11 at night. but no you couldn't pick me up a block away. man sometimes i feel as if you used me and you probably do. you probably do it so often you don't even realize it no more. sometimes i fucken hate you. you know you make me fucken cry all the fucken time because you fucken hurt me. you say all this shit and all and i treat you fucken nice all the time but why can't you do the littlest thing for me. you can't take me no where and you can't pick me up unless it has to do with Aaron. ugh i hate you. and sometimes i never ever wanna talk to you.
    ugh i'm starting to have weight issues =/ everything everyone has said finally broke me down. it's all getting to me.